When Young Black Male Lives are Worthless

Something has been really troubling my spirit lately. The recent spate of Black on Black killings in my neighbourhood. Now, I haven't been immune to this horrific dilemma that has been like a venomous cancer in my community, but I hold up my hand and admit that I have been kind of complacent. Its not because I don't care, but I just feel hopeless about it. There are no loud voices proclaiming justice or peace. No chorus of voices, just an abandoned riff of sadness. I've added to this inconclusive and mute landscape, and I also hold myself responsible for this as well - or protesting at the local police station about how this will be thwarted, but still the silence which has deafened me over the years has made me try to learn sign language of these young men.

 Instead, I, like others have found a real comfortable spot in the sand and burrowed my head deep within, hoping that the killings will eventually stop; that the self hatred will fade away like a pair of well faded levis. Bu I know they will not. They're just becoming more and more frenzied. Young Black males annihilating themselves because of 'respect' and affiliating themselves to gangs who are giving them 'love' and self esteem that they are not automatically gaining from their family members.
My neighbourhood is becoming a overpopulated cemetery, scarred indelibly with the bodies of young black men, who are killing themselves senselessly, due to a sense of hatred and loathing for self. That is it in a nutshell.

I remember, several years back, when my youngest son who was attending high school in another borough, used to literally run a marathon race everyday to our local train station - each way -  so he would not be caught up in the 'postcode honour' that these young black boys seem to seek validation from. The 'postcode honour' is about finding out if you are from their 'manor'; their area. If not, you're liable to get beaten up, or even worse, harmed. perhaps in a fatal way. Why? Because their like tomcats, marking and spraying their territories. Also, because they hate what they see, they also destroy their own likeness of themselves.

Thankfully, after I went to live for a couple of years in Holland, he lived with his father as he was attending college up there. His father lives in suburbia and it's not so bad as it is, living here in the inner city. I am proud to say, that my son made conscious, and wise choices and decisions - he had no choice with his father and me as his parents. Suffice to say, he will be attending university to undertake his degree in September 2012.

*Update*

My son is now in university and thriving. I am really proud of his sense of achievements and I am so happy that he, as with my other son, did not persist to peer pressure and become another 'statistic'.

On&On&On... My Personal and Loving Rebuttal to Erykah Badu

Just recently, there has been a lot of controversy surrounding one of my favourite artist's, Erykah Badu. This controversy was about how she had no idea about what kind of image that was being sent out regarding a promo video that she and her sister were featured on and how she felt 'manipulated' and violated.

 Let me just preface this and let you know, I have all her albums, seen her live in concert endless times when she has travelled to Europe; in fact, I remember seeing her live at the Jazz Cafe years ago before she became the mega superstar in the noughties. I am what you call a person who loves her vibe; I don't consider myself a 'fan', because to me that has too many negative connotations attached to it. I even had the chance in meeting and chatting with her several years ago when she was invited to London to a natural hair conference - check my video on youtube: Erykah Badu @ Adornment 2007 and she struck me as a very down to earth sista. So... having said that, I'm disappointed in you Ms Badu. Look, we're all human, and yes, we do have our fallacies - we are not perfect, and that is a great thing, because with our imperfections can come gradual revelations that help us to grow, learn and proceed with our lives.

 However, when we are in the public eye and under that judgemental (at times) microscope, we need to really overstand how mainstream perceives us. Let me state right here, we do not need to censor ourselves,  seek validation or compromise our art, but at the same token, we have to have an AWARENESS of the bigger picture and what is involved in that bigger picture. Thus, we need to not only look at the picture, but the frame and the context of that picture as well, in my humble opinion!


Anyway, here is Erykah's rebuttal to the controversy about the video:

3:33pm dallas 

@waynecoyne then... perhaps, next time u get an occasion to work with an artist who respects your mind/art, you should send at least a ROUGh version of the video u PLAN to release b4 u manipulate or compromise the artist's brand by desperately releasing a poor excuse for shock and nudity that sends a convoluted message that passes as art( to some).
Even with Window Seat there was a method and thought process involved. I have not one need for publicity . I just love artistic dialogue . And just because an image is shocking does not make it art. 
You obviously have a misconception of who I am artistically. I don't mind that but...
By the way you are an ass. 
Yu did everything wrong from the on set . 
First:
You showed me a concept of beautiful tasteful imagery( by way of vid text messages) . 
I trusted that. I was mistaken. 
Then u release an unedited, unapproved version within the next few days. 
That all spells 1 thing , 
Self Serving . 
When asked what the concept 
meant after u explained it , u replied ,"it doesn't mean anything , I just want to make a great video that everyone is going to watch. " 
I understood , because as an artist we all desire that. But we don't all do it at another artist's expense . 
I attempted to resolve this respectfully by having conversations with u after the release but that too proved to be a poor excuse for art. 
From jump, 
You begged me to sit in a tub of that other shit and I said naw. I refused to sit in any liquid that was not water. But Out of RESPECT for you and the artist you 'appear' to be, I Didn't wanna kill your concept , wanted u to at least get it out of your head . After all, u spent your dough on studio , trip to Dallas etc.. Sooo, I invited Nayrok , my lil sis and artist, who is much more liberal ,to be subject of those other disturbing (to me ) scenes . I told u from jump that I believed your concept to be disturbing. But would give your edit a chance. 
You then said u would take my shots ( in clear water/ fully covered parts -seemed harmless enough) and Nayrok's part ( which I was not present for but saw the photos and a sample scene of cornstarch dripping ) and edit them together along with cosmic, green screen images ( which no one saw) then would show me the edit. . 
Instead, U disrespected me by releasing pics and rough vid on the internet without my approval. (Contract breech )
That is equivalent to putting out a security camera's images of me changing in the fitting room. 
I never would have approved that tasteless, meaningless, shock motivated video . 
Our art is a reflection of who we are . I have no connection to those images shot in their raw version. I was interested in seeing an amazing edit that would perhaps change or alter my thoughts . Never happened . 
You also did the same thing with the song itself which displays crappy "rough "vocals by me . I let it go , perhaps iiiii was missing something, I thought. 
I Should have followed my first mind back in studio when recording the vocals "your way". 
( Red flag.) It was uncomfortable. 
For that I am at fault . 
Consequently, brother, As a human I am disgusted with your what appears to be desperation and poor execution. And disregard for others . As a director I am unimpressed . As a sociologist I understand your type. As your fellow artist I am uninspired. As a woman I feel violated and underestimated. 
Hope it works out for ya ,Wayne. 
Really i could give a shit less.
Still love your live show tho. 
And , you're welcomed. 
Lesson learned . 
By the way I have guested in very few videos. But I have always been given the opportunity to see the edit and contribute to it when my roll is substantial. Not this time . 
I guess u feel it better to apologize than ask for permission and be refused . Hey, Love u man, but your ways are not very nice . 
O, And on behalf of all the artists u have manipulated or plan to manipulate, find another way . 
These things have been said out of necessity. 
And if you don't like it 
you can KiSS MY Glittery ASS .
O and Nayrok told me to tell u to kiss her ass too .
Almost forgot. 
Peace 

Ms. Badu

source: Erykah's Rebuttal

So, I imagined, what would I say if I had the same opportunity to write a rebuttal to what she had written about the video. Well, here it is. Any thoughts? Comments would be wholeheartedly appreciated!

'I'm an artist, I'm sensitive about my shit!' 


Erykah, Erykah... I've seen the video, and what I saw was soft porn, not 'art'. Overall, it was exploitative and I felt like a voyeur watching it. I read all of the reactions about it being 'art', but my spirit was itching. This was not ART, as much as people wanted to pass it off as ART. It was exploitative soft porn. Yes. Soft porn.

How could you be so DANG NAIVE??? Yes, I overstand the context of your artistic endeavours, but Ms Badu, you got PLAYED like a piece of chess. Did you have no idea that these 21st century  men would undermine and insidiously exploit and manipulate you and your sister's  BLACK BODIES; I mean, lets be frank, their ancestors have been doing this for centuries. Aint nothing new with this particular notion! 


How could you, as an 'artist' let such sensitive images go unseen, without permission? This to me was a digital raping; this may seem as an exaggeration, but this is how I saw it when I painfully watched your video through slightly dampened eyes. When your ancestors were raped several centuries ago, they had no choice, but you had a choice, with your 21st century voice. But their voices were muted due to their gender and their fragile and pathetic status as enslaved women on the plantations. 

Ms Badu, I am a fan of you and your music, but you need better people on your side who have your BACK. 

As an artist, I get the notion of art and how one must and can apply and express oneself through the many avenues of their art, but to then go and backpedal because of you maybe(?) wising up to the exploitative and sneaky nature in how the video was released and unleashed on the general public; Ms Badu YOU need to have your 3rd eye open at all times, especially when it concerns you and how the mainstream and the manipulative and pernicious nature of media constantly keeps on vilifying the BLACK BODY for their overall consumption.

Keep being you  with your art for art's sake Ms Badu, but please be involved and evolved with your  production, your involvement and your context of how your image may be  misconstrued. You have had too many years in the industry to be naive in how you are being ultimately perceived.

Still inspired by you, Ms Badu!

Love, Light and Blessings

Tai  

Young, Gifted and Black: A Badge To Wear With Honour and Pride

The lyrics of the above song still resound within my soul, forty plus years after its release. This song was written by Nina Simone - one of my favourite artistes of all times- however, growing up, I'm familiar with the above version and it brings so much happy memories for me.

The song and the lyrics still make my soul sing and revitiise my spirit. It makes me smile and feel all warm and secure within. It makes my soul hunger to hear  these kind of lyrics again within popular culture. Not because they validate who I am, but they validate in my own personal belief and philosophy of being gifted and black. The young, not so much now! However, let me just interject here, that I say all of this with utter humility, but because I feel this way - it took me a long time to reach this destination - in the past, I have been accused of being  'arrogant', 'aggressive' and 'too confident'. Hmmmmm... sounds familiar! See, when you are Black and a woman ( or a Black man for that matter, but the labels are usually more pernicious), these negative labels remain a burden around your neck and a heavy weight that you have to carry on your back - until you are ready to eject them and, metamorphise into a beautiful butterfly and  feel free, once again.

Earlier on, I was reading an online newspaper The Continued Cyberbullying of Mischa B about Misha B. For folks who are unfamiliar with this beautiful, young, darkskinned, talented young woman, she is a contestant on the UK's X Factor. From the beginning, when I saw this beautiful young woman sing in her auditions, I knew that she'd make it far in the competition, however, since then, when she showed that she was confident, young, gifted and Black, she seemed to have struck a nasty and begrudging  nerve with the UK viewing public. It was made even worse when she was accused of bullying Misha B accused of being a backstage bully Ever since then she has been accused of being 'over confident', 'arrogant', 'having a chip on her shoulder' and other negative descriptions. One only has to see the majority of negative and hurtful comments that have been attached to her.

Why so much venom and hatred? Is it because she shows, in the face of adversity, that like Maya Angelou's poem, that she will 'still rise'? The level of bullying that she has been accused of in the past - and these were just allegations which have never been proven by the way - definitely has some hidden agenda from some of these rabid media outlets, waiting to pluck her bare bones when she is finally voted out of the competition. In fact, the media are guilty of doing the same thing that Misha B has been accused of. Woe betide if she remains a finalist. It will be interesting to analyse the media's reaction then and what their next step will be. She'll probably be accused of being a cannibal or a serial killer. Yes, I know I'm being a bit over the top, but I know I may not be far from the mark.

I know that the two most famous black women in popular culture at the moment are Rhianna and Beyonce, but they seem to be 'safe' and 'non threatening' and dare I say, seen as 'beautiful' and 'desirous'  to the general public. In fact, they are embraced by the majority of people, regardless of race. So why has Misha B, who is just starting her singing journey, singled out with all of this unrepentant hatred? Well, I know, from experience, as I explained at the beginning, why this common, yet, unconscious (or is it conscious?) occurrence always happens. Once you are a black woman - stone me now if you want -  and darkskinned as well, you are meant to 'know your place' and position in society. Your not meant to be 'young, gifted and black'. Because, if you carry these positive labels around with you, expect the venom, hatred and absolute fear from mainstream societies. Yes, I said, FEAR.

I do not have any girls, however,  I have two, fine, young men and I used to sing Young, Gifted and Black to them all the time as a lullaby when they were babies. I really hope that Misha B has somebody strong in her life - and I think she has, as she was brought up by her aunty who instilled a sense of self within her; this is evident ( I know this from the audition I saw of Misha B).

I know that when I watch Misha B this Saturday on TV, I will be cheering her from the sidelines and singing Young, Gifted and Black at the top of my lungs to cheer her on. If she does not win this competition, I know that her star will soar far into the universe, leaving the lukewarm competitors behind in their soon forgotten singing careers. Good luck Misha B, I'm rooting for you!



Young, Gifted and Black


 To be young, gifted and black,
Oh what a lovely precious dream
To be young, gifted and black,
Open your heart to what I mean

In the whole world you know
There's a billion boys and girls
Who are young, gifted and black,
And that’s a fact!

You are young, gifted and black
We must begin to tell our young
There’s a world waiting for you
Yours is the quest that’s just begun

When you feel really low
Yeah, there’s a great truth you should know
When you’re young, gifted and black
Your soul’s intact

Young, gifted and black
How I long to know the truth
There are times when I look back
And I am haunted by my youth

Oh but my joy of today
Is that we can all be proud to say
To be young, gifted and black
Is where it’s at